The vents are blowing warm air, you’ve pulled out the cozy blankets (thank you for that, by the way) and your warm boots are regularly sitting at the door. Based upon my extraordinary skills of deduction, I can only guess that it’s almost the time of year when you buy a bunch of things that you wrap and put into boxes (my favorite!), put up a tree that I’m not supposed to climb in, and get a little crazy about weird parties with ugly sweaters. I know this time of year can be stressful (I can pick up on your moods, remember?), so I want to help you out this year. Follow my advice and you’ll have the most purr-fect wrapped-boxes-weird-tree time of year ever.

The Purr-fect Holiday: Holiday Tips From Your Cat

Let me climb in your tree, but please anchor it first.

Seriously, you’re going to bring that thing in here and expect me to just leave it alone? No way. You know I want to get in there and jump out at the dog, bat the weird hanging things around, and observe my kingdom from the highest point in the room. Why deny me that simple pleasure? I don’t ask for much, and I think this would be a really special way to show me how much you care. Oh, but can you please anchor it first? Neither of us wants to find out what will happen when I climb all the way to the top and it starts to sway… I’ll probably be fine thanks to my amazing reflexes, but I can’t say the same for the tree or the items surrounding it.

While we’re talking about this, can you please make sure that any other seasonal items you decide to litter our house with are safe for me? You know I can’t help myself when it comes to exploring new things.

Not sure what to serve? Ask your cat.

It’s a-paw-lling how little consideration you give me when it comes to your holiday menu planning. Sure, you like rolls and cranberry sauce, but have you ever wondered what I would like for my dinner? Turkey is fine and all, but why not try something new, like tuna? Yogurt is the purr-fect compliment. What more could you want?

While we’re on this topic, keep in mind that some foods that aren’t safe for me. Can we make sure they don’t somehow end up on the menu? Let’s avoid onions, garlic, chocolate, caffeine, grapes, raisins, milk (although I love it so much- it can sometimes give me digestive troubles), alcohol, raw eggs, raw fish, and fat trimmings.

Don’t forget my stocking.

You buy gifts for everyone else, am I really supposed to not take offense to it if I don’t get something, too? Generally speaking, I’m 100% okay with playing in the empty boxes from everyone else’s gifts, but it is the thought that counts, and if you forget to get me my own present, you may find a few misplaced litterbox presents… if you catch my drift. Not sure what to get me? How about some tasty salmon oil soft chews? I’ve also had my eye on these hairball soft chews that will help me pass my hairballs more easily.

Spend more time with your cat.

This time of year is all about togetherness… or so I hear, anyway. Skip your awkward office parties, the cookie exchanges you don’t actually want to do, and that ugly sweater party you are planning to attend and stay home with me. I miss you when you’re gone, and I think some additional quality time together would be good for us. Plus, I want to show you all of the cool tricks I’ve practiced in the tree while you’ve been at work.

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